Getting those two pink lines the second time around is definitely not the same as the first. This time, Ramil and I are mentally prepared for it because it was planned. Also, there’s a two-year-old jumping up and down with us although he doesn’t fully realize what the fuss was with the stick I was holding. Knowing what we know now, Ramil and I are less scared and less unsure.

Nevertheless, the decision to have a second child did not come as easy as we’d thought it would be. Although we both knew we wanted more than one child, we didn’t know when the perfect time is to follow it up with another one.

We’ve considered several things before finally deciding to go for it. It also helps to ask other people around us, especially those who’ve had several children already.

• Spacing. This is one of the primary things that we considered. Closer ages or farther apart? We didn’t want them too close because it’s going to be difficult taking care of two very small kids. However, we also didn’t want them spaced that far apart because we figured they’d find it easier to become friends if they are closer in age. We’ve set our personal choice: a minimum of two years so that Mateo will be getting out of the terrible years by the time the second child comes and a maximum of four years so that they’d still be in high school together.
• Finances. So far, the spacing we’ve agreed upon is also agreeable to our financial situation. We wanted the next one when Mateo is not using diapers anymore so that we won’t spend twice as much.
• Ready-ness of first child. Fortunately, Mateo is not the jealous type although we have yet to test his limits once the baby comes. Before deciding to go for another child though, we’ve carefully thought about how Mateo will take it. Also, as early as now, we involve him in the expectations that we have. We always look for opportunities to talk to him about what’s going to happen in the next few months and to expose him to smaller babies as well.

There, those three are our biggest considerations in having our second child. We have a very excited household right now and saying that everyone can’t wait for the new member is an understatement.

Tags: baby, Parenting, pregnancy, second child