Even the seemingly perfect marriages are not exempt from experiencing small bumps along the way. Most of the time, no matter what the issue is, small criticisms build up and contribute to the problem.

Still, it does not mean that you should avoid criticizing your partner. Sometimes criticisms that are given and taken constructively could actually improve your relationship. Below are some tips on how to handle criticisms in your marriage.

• Ask before you criticize. Let your partner know that you want to express something that will come as a criticism. This way, your spouse can choose not to hear it.
• Criticize with love. Never give criticisms as a way of attacking your partner. Say them in a way that will still acknowledge his good traits and characteristics. Make sure you give two or more compliments for every criticism that you give. If you are talking as if you are scolding your child then it is time to take a step back and change how you are communicating with your spouse. Talk in a loving way and never with anger.
• Criticize behavior and never character. Focus on specific things that your partner did that you think should be addressed. Instead of saying ‘You are rude’ say ‘I know you were tired but I did not like the way that you talked to me earlier’.
• Be specific. Cite specific examples and discuss how your spouse could have handled it.
• Use ‘I’ instead of ‘you’. You will notice a big change in the tone of your conversations if you start your statements with ‘I’ instead of ‘you’. Starting everything with ‘you’ comes off as attacks or accusations.
• Skip the criticism. Before giving any criticism, ask yourself whether it will be of any use to you, your partner, and your relationship if you voice out your criticisms.

Many married men and women have their own mother-in-law stories to tell. Some even believe that no one really gets along with their mother-in-laws even if she is a perfectly nice person.

Still, Ramil and I are lucky that we both have in-laws that we get along with relatively well. However, some are not as lucky as the two of us. I know some people have really tumultuous relationships with their in-laws. If you are one of those people, below are some tips that could help you.

• Spend time with them. Try to spend more time with your in-laws instead of avoiding them. During your these times, consciously look for things to like about them instead of focusing on their things that you do not like.
• Calm yourself. Avoid working up yourself if you know you will be seeing your in-laws. Some people make the mistake of getting all worked up even before they get together with their in-laws.
• Agree to disagree. Even if you married their son or daughter, it does not mean that your views and principles will match. Keep in mind that you do not have to be right all the time and you need not share the same views and principles. You only have to respect them.

A few weeks before finally deciding to let mateo join the 1A (youngest) class of the Preschool level, I distinctly remember asking andrea how sure she was about the idea. I told her that the moment mateo starts school, it was the first step to letting him go. Now, eight months into the school year, we finally realize how true my fear was.

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Back in October, andrea and I experienced one of the worst heartaches we’ve ever felt. We lost our second baby. She was only three months old and still in her mommy’s tummy but she was ours. Now, several months after, here we are again, expecting.

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Today, Ramil and I celebrate four years of being husband and wife. Dare I say four years of wedded bliss? Most of the time, yes. Because honestly speaking, our four years as a wedded couple has been more peaceful and relaxed than our five years together before getting married. We almost never fight. We have more time together – intimate and otherwise. We are content, happy, and satisfied.

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After my three months of pregnancy, I am itching to go back to my fitness goal. Before I got pregnant, I’ve been walking and running around our subdivision whenever I feel the need to work up a sweat.

However, the pregnancy put a halt to all my attempts to get fit because my doctor advised me to stop running and limit myself to brisk walking. Since the miscarriage made me feel depressed as well, I have decided to fight back by making myself feel better. I have thus made a goal of running my first five-kilometer race a month from now.

To immerse myself further in this new fitness goal, I’ve even started my very own running blog. I’ve also been reading up a lot on running as a sport and joining local online communities to keep myself updated. Just when I thought that running will be the easiest sport to learn, I feel a bit overwhelmed with the amount of information I’ve been getting.

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It is inevitable that a married couple would go through mourning at some time in their married life. It could be the death of a parent, a sibling, or any other relative. One of the most painful though, is the death of a child.

When a child of a married couple dies, the intensity of the grief could overwhelm each of them. Their primary source of support and comfort, which is each other, would likewise be dealing with his or her own grief. For this reason, many couples buckle down when they encounter a trial like this. For any married couple, the loss of a child will either make their marriage stronger or break it.

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This love affair did not happen by accident. It was a conscious decision to go for it, a conscious decision to make a lifelong commitment to another person. Nevertheless, it was never forced. If nothing should come of it then we wouldn’t be any less happy, we knew the right time would come.

So imagine our excitement when we realized that God is agreeing to the love affair. I was pampered and allowed to eat anything I want. We were expecting a commitment that will last for the rest of our lives. Imagine the pain and shock when we realized that it was ended abruptly, with no warning at all.

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Getting those two pink lines the second time around is definitely not the same as the first. This time, Ramil and I are mentally prepared for it because it was planned. Also, there’s a two-year-old jumping up and down with us although he doesn’t fully realize what the fuss was with the stick I was holding. Knowing what we know now, Ramil and I are less scared and less unsure.

Nevertheless, the decision to have a second child did not come as easy as we’d thought it would be. Although we both knew we wanted more than one child, we didn’t know when the perfect time is to follow it up with another one.

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Mateo just turned two last January but we’re hoping to enroll him in the youngest class of the school where we teach. The class often consists of children from 2.5 to 3.5 years old and Mateo would barely make it to the minimum age. However, since it’s better than staying at home with a yaya we’re trying to condition him for school.

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